Spirituality XII
Bishop Roger
So now we come to prayer, which is a mainstay of our religious life. It is very easy to get overexcited about prayer, as many do, because it is so important, and so it has, it seems, to be made ‘special’. You have to go to a special place, make special signs, kneel or stand or sit in a special way, and use special words, some so archaic that they appear to mean the opposite of what you are trying to say. That is all rubbish, befuddling nonsense imposed by those who so dearly want to control your thinking to increase their own self worth. It is not surprising then that people are put off by the idea of prayer, and even fear it, leading so many to leave the religious institutions which should have been such a help to the spiritual life.
Prayer is, very simply, talking to God directly, as you would to anyone else, whenever and wherever you want to. Jesus taught that we should approach God as a loving father. Some people sadly have not had the experience of a loving father, but they probably can imagine a loving friend. And that father/friend is always available, all wise, and lovingly non-judgmental, so we are at liberty to say anything, ask anything, discuss anything, when we need to.
That’s all prayer is in essence, but we can and should warm it up a bit. And it must be done without pomp or show – Jesus said ‘Go into your room and close the door’ and ‘let not your right hand know what your left hand does’. We can argue about his meanings in this as in all things, but basically prayer is a private activity except for formal corporate situations.
We can start with the sign of the cross. This is not essential and can easily be omitted, but it puts us in the mood for prayer, reminding us what we are doing, and with regular use becomes an ‘portal of entry’ to the state of prayer, and, at the end of prayer, closes that portal and returns us to everyday life again. Kneeling or other special postures are not necessary. Just make yourself comfortable.
Then we must think of what we are doing. Prayer used to be divided into the so-called ‘acts’ ACTS which provide a useful mnemonic for the beginner (and for the more mature in prayer. Never think you have ‘grown out’ of this stage!).
‘A’ stands for adoration, which is perhaps our prime function in prayer, and possibly reflects to us most joy, so we tell God how much we love and worship him. But don’t overdo it. Have you ever had the experience of being ‘idolised’, perhaps as a youngster, and discovered how that idolization becomes wearing after a while, even to the extent of irritation? Maybe God feels like that too. So while Adoration begins with expressions of love and worship let it soon develop into a silent worshipful expression of love – no need for words. Sometimes one word repeated can be a help – for example ‘Jesus’ or Love’ but remember that Jesus said ‘not everyone who calls me Lord. Lord will reach the Kingdom of Heaven’ (Matt 7;21) This adoration should make up most, or even all, of a prayer session
‘C’ is for contrition. Do not make too much of this. Certainly we should be sorry for our misdeeds, but never allow your pride to inveigle you into being a ‘sinner’. Remember that the Greek translated as sin is a word meaning ‘missing the target’ ie a failure or a mistake, and a loving God will be understanding of our failures. Of course be sorry, repair the failure if you can, then try again to hit the target. There is no need for hand wringing cringing unworthiness.
‘T’ is for thanksgiving. Unlike in ‘contrition’ here we can let ourselves go. We have so much to be thankful for even in the worst circumstances if we look for it, and all has come from God. The works of Thomas Traherne and a couple of the Psalms (such as 150) give plenty of material to work into our prayers of thanksgiving if we need it.
Finally ‘S’, supplication , or asking. It is not for nothing that this is put last. In fact for most people it is the prime reason for ‘prayer’. Often as part of a bargain ‘if you do x I will be good for ever’ or similar. If you think about it God does not bargain, nor can he. Both sides of a war can’t win, however hard they both pray . Jimmy’s wonderful cricket weather may not be the rain that Farmer Giles desperately is praying for. So be selective in your supplications. The ‘magical’ fraternity always teaches ‘be careful what you ask for – you may get it!’. And all spiritual teachers have taught that if you ask it is best to do so for others than for yourself – though requests for yourself are legitimate in times of dire need – but always with the proviso that Our Lord taught ‘if it conforms with Your will, O God’.
These private acts of prayer can be used whenever and wherever you wish and should be so frequent throughout the day as to perfume it with the reciprocal love of yourself and God. There are many formal prayers in books and elsewhere that you can learn and may wish to work into your prayer life, but just as you don’t converse in quotation, however useful they may be on occasion, it is best to talk to God as yourself.
However formal prayer has its place and that and a few other considerations will make up the next and last of this series.
